Heart's Exile
by Eaving1989
Summary: For years nothing had mattered to her but survival. But to survive, she had to forget her emotions, exile her heart to remain.... A Kingdom Under Fire fic, The story of Ellen...


**Heart's Exile**

Prologue

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The forest was quiet and Arein was far behind them. 

The city may be far behind, but the pain and the years of bad memories were still there, weighing her down. Alaris walked along beside a placid bay mare, her elegant hand clutching the horses bridle. Upon the horses back was her most precious possession, the one she had fled her home to protect. Her daughter… Ellen.

Ellen sat straight in the saddle, so proud for one so young. Her raven black hair spilled down her small shoulders; thick and shimmering in the dappled forest light. Normally delicately pointed ears –miniature versions of Alaris' own- would have been visible, but they were gone now. Alaris felt white hot rage curdle her belly. Monsters had hurt her baby. All she had to do was lift a hand and brush away the hair to see the scarring. Those monsters, those _bastards_!

_There had been so many of them, filling the narrow street. All dressed in white veils. Hungry for blood. _

Alaris shuddered at the memory. It was still so vivid. She knew it would haunt her for the rest of her life. Ellen turned down to look at her mother, understanding in her grey eyes. On the inside Alaris wept for her daughter, because her daughter would not weep for herself. Those grey eyes had changed. No longer were they the laughing eyes of her child, full of innocence and questions. They were sad, knowing, their former brightness dulled by the cruelties of the world.

_They had carried torches, brandished swords. Elves, all of them yelling. Yelling for her daughter. Screaming for the 'abomination'. _

Once Alaris had been fool enough to think that Ellen would grow up without ever having to face such things. She had put too much faith in untrustworthy individuals. There had been small incidents during Ellen's childhood of such discrimination. Elvish mothers not letting their children play with the 'half-blood', stares and whispers as they had walked down the street, but Ellen had been oblivious to these things. Or so Alaris had thought. Ellen had taken to petty thievery, stealing and playing tricks on those that had laughed at her, pointed and called her names. Had Alaris known she would have put an end to it on the spot, such things could only lead to trouble.

_They had dragged them out of the house by the hair, before setting the building ablaze. She had been held by four men, making her watch while they burnt everything she had ever owned. Making her watch while they scarred her daughter. _

Alaris did not know that her expression had changed to a rictus snarl, or that her hand was clasped white-knuckle tight on the hilt of her sword. Ellen watched her mother concernedly. Alaris saw the concern, even pity, in her daughter's eyes. She snapped. _How_ could Ellen look at her like that? _Why_ _wouldn't she cry_?

"Don't look at me like that, Ellen." She said coolly, her voice detached from the emotion she felt.

Ellen cringed, muttering "Sorry, mother."

Alaris was burned with self-reproach. How could she talk to her daughter like that? Especially after all she had been through. "I am sorry, Little One. I shouldn't snap at you."

_Men held her daughter, one with a dagger in his hands, the blade glowing red hot. The brute with the dagger grabbed Ellen by the hair, pulling her head back to expose her slim throat. Alaris felt her knees give out from under her. She was screaming. If only she had her blade she would wipe the smirk of that animal's face. He teased her, running the dagger close to Ellen's throat, but never touching the skin. Ellen stared at her mother, grey eyes never wavering, full of an eerie emptiness. _

"You are too brave for your own good, Ellen. Sometimes such bravery can blind you." Blue eyes pleaded with grey. _She had to understand!_ "There is too much of your father in you, Little One - all ice and steel, but no sense. There are times when we need to cry, it keeps us sane. Promise me that you will cry when you need to."

_Fingers swept black hair, exposing pointed elf ears, delicate as silk. Hands gripped the pointed tips and the blade slashed. Flesh was separated from flesh, and the smell of burnt skin filled nostrils. The mob howled. The other ear went as well. Not once did Ellen flinch or make a sound. _

"Promise me you will never lose yourself."

"I promise, mother."

"That's my girl." Alaris cooed. Tears stained her cheeks, one hand cupping a ruined ear. Gently, she ran a thumb across the tortured flesh, still red and black from where the heated blade had cut and burned. She kissed her daughters temple. "They were scared, baby. Sacred because they didn't understand… they didn't see how special you are."

Finally Ellen wept. Throwing herself from the saddle into her mother's waiting arms.

The city was far behind them, but their journey was only beginning. Alaris clutched her sobbing daughter tighter, kissing her hair. They would head to Woodenshade, and though the Pineth Caves to Ecclesia. The road would be hard, but maybe there Alaris could raise her daughter in peace.

All she had was hope…

But it was enough.

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**A/N: **Here's the prologue for the Kingdom Under Fire fic co-authored with Arrasailsup. Chapter 1 won't be far behind. So, from both of us, enjoy this and keep your eyes peeled for the next updates. 


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